And then there was fire

Yep. There was. One of those things that I know needed to be fixed was the battery. No big deal, I removed the old battery and took it to Battery Masters down the street and they checked it for me (for free mind you, and tried to charge it overnight, also for free). It wasn't working, so I bought a new one. My first investment in my bike since I bought it! Yay! $35 later, I went to put the new battery in place of the old one. Still, pretty simple stuff. I installed the new one, without complications. At first. At this point I am feeling really proud, yet recognizing that this might not even actually qualify as motorcycle repair. But I'm counting it. I push the button, and the engine turns over. Eureka! Houston we have contact. I am super-proud. Until suddenly, giant sparks start flying across the room. Now, I know a bit about physics and electrical current, at least enough to know to not touch metal that is shooting sparks. Simultaneously, the idle keeps getting higher and higher (my throttle sticks somehow, that's next order of business...), and I felt the panic building. Holy crap balls, how the hell do you turn something off that is sparking and all metal? Well, I braved it and turned it off (then on again and off again, a couple of more times for fun). I disconnected the battery, still shooting sparks about a foot across the room. Of course I took pictures, but without the sparks.